Holding the Door Open

What I don’t understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise... I decide to do good, but I don’t really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway... It happens so regularly that it’s predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up.

- excerpts from Romans 7:15-25 (The Message)

When I read these words from Paul, I thought, "Amen! Me too, Paul. Me too." I am constantly doing things I don't want to do. I know better, and yet - here we are. As Paul says, "The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to Trip me up."

You too?

Thank goodness I'm not alone.

I know I shouldn't eat 12 cookies, but I do.

I don't want to be mean when I'm hungry, but, alas, "hanger" is a real thing.

I don't want to be rude when I'm cranky, but I am.

But it goes deeper than that.

As someone who considers myself an ally, I don't want to have racist, homophobic, transphoic, sexist, ablist thoughts, but - and this really stinks to admit - sometimes, I do.

I know better. Deep in my bones, I know better. And I want to do better. I know what is right, and yet, sin trips me up.

As the apostle Paul says, "I obviously need help!"

We will inevitably get things wrong in life. Over and over and over again, we will get it wrong. That is no surpise to anyone - not even Jesus, not even God.

We get things wrong because we are human, and because that is how we learn.

Jesus didn't come to earth to sit on a high throne and judge us; he came to teach us and to heal us. He's holding the door open. He sees our screw-ups and says, "Beloved, you are a child of God. That other person - they are, too. Act accordingly." He taught us that to love God means to love our neighbor.

When Jesus says, "Come to me all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest, for my yoke is easy and my burden is light." He isn't just offering comfort. There's another layer to this. Those who would've heard Jesus say this in person would've understood yoke to mean, "following the Torah." AKA, following God's teachings and God's law. When Jesus says this, he's telling his followers, 'you are weary and burdened because you have been following the ways of the world, and not my ways. You are exhausted because doing wrong and causing harm is exhausting. Put that down; pick up my yoke. It is easier and you will find rest for your soul.'

It is still a yoke, but it weighs a lot less.

My friend, Jesus is our greatest teacher. When you get frustrated with yourself, like Paul, feeling like you just can't seem to get it right. You keep getting tripped up. Come back to Jesus' teaching. Let him remind you who you are and whose you are. You are a beloved child of God - a God who created you and called you GOOD. When you make a mistake, be open to teaching and learning. Be able to admit and confess and you have done wrong, and then repent - let it change your heart.

And know this: every time you move out of alignment with you who are, created in God's image, Jesus will be there to forgive you and call you back.

Jesus is not just a judge; he is a teacher and a healer. Let him teach you. Let him heal you.